Hard to be Scrooge

Well we've spent the last 10 days trying to get over a cold. Both Teresa & I picked up something our last day or two in Ukraine. Runny nose, stuff running down our throats. Oops overshare.

We usually alternate between our families each Christmas, this year we stayed home. We didn't decorate anything. Wayne (younger son) came over for a few hours and it was all very relaxed. We talked to lots of our family by phone and that made it seem a little more like Christmas.

Where things are with Dennis, Sergei, and Vitali: We have written and had notorized all the information that we thought was relevant to the case and met with the attorney for the State Department for Adoption in Kyiv. They will forward a letter to the director in the town where the kids were born asking that he justify how the current situation is in all of the kids best interest. He will need to respond by February.

We never know how much to believe of everything that we see or hear. If we thought that the kids would all be together or near each other we would leave things as they are now. However we were told that a Psychologist interviewed the boys and they were not aware that they had a younger sister. According to some written reports and some other comments the kids biological father died shortly after she was born. She spent the first 18 months of her life in the hospital (we suspect fetal alcohol syndrome)and then was moved directly into the foster home where she still is. About nine months after she was born the parental rights of the mother were revoked. The record says that she was present in court that day and did not object to her rights for all four kids being terminated. The social worker found the boys with no adults in the home. All of the furniture had been sold, there was no firewood, coal or gas at the home and the electricity had been shut off. It also listed the mother as an alcoholic and living an immoral lifestyle. Sadly that seems typical for many of the children in the orphanages.

From what we were told the father had had three wives and eleven children among them before he died. The boys mother being the last of the three. The boys do seem to remember having some half-siblings. Over the last two years they have only been visited once by a grandmother.

At present the foster family receives a pension (something like what social security in the US would provide a surviving child) as well as payments for being foster parents. When we were first told about the girl we said no problem we will adopt all four of them. Later we were told that she was already adopted by the foster family and finally that they filed adoption papers when they heard we had a referral for the boys. At each step along the way we asked if that would be a problem for us adopting the boys and were always told it would not be. Until the last time when we learned that the papers had not been filed until after we arrived.

The inspector is following Ukrainian law about not seperating children however that same law says that you must do what is in the best interest of all of the children. It appears to us that it is in the foster family's financial interest to never complete the adoption of the girl. They have already said they can't adopt all four kids. The problem with this scenario is that it means the boys will never be adoptable and will remain in the orphanage system until they age out somewhere around 16-18 years old.

So for now we are willing to wait a few months and see if there is any possibility that we can adopt the boys.

As Americans we now know that in terms of material things we have all of our needs met and most of our wants. We have a loving and supportive family, we have friends, neighbors and a church that also supports us emotionally and with their time. (Hopefully we can pay it forward) Why were we born Americans when most of the people born on this planet are just barely getting by? I don't know.

Even in our personal finances we are much better off than we thought we would be just a few weeks ago. Our facilitator itemized the actual expenses of the trip and sent us home with the rest of the cash that had not been spent. Some of our time off was understood to be unpaid and yet employers provided Christmas bonuses that covered the time we were off.

We have been very angry that everything did not work out the way we had hoped and yet for the last few days I've had a song running through my head from about twenty years ago. It's called "doubly good to you"

If you look at the blogs that I follow you will see that Heidi and Felix got home on Christmas Eve with their kids. Join us in Thanking God that they are home and with three new Americans. (Adopted kids become American citizens when they land here) And please continue to pray with us that Jim & Kari will soon have their kids home also.

Our story is not over yet but we will post much less frequently over the next few months. Two accountants, year end reports for four organizations and having been away for four weeks should keep us off the blog for most of the time.

May you enjoy a very Merry Christmas with those who are most important to you at this time of year. And remember to Thank the Lord, He's been doubly good to You.

Home! Time for work and to regroup.

It's been a long 27 hour day but we are home. When we landed in NY we thought we loved the sound of English. However after sitting on the runway for over an hour and then enduring another five hours of flight with your stereotypical loud Americans talking non-stop we may have to reconsider.

Depending on how we sleep I don't know that we will be to work right at 8 but it is good to be home.

Thanks Julie for picking us up extra late when you have school tomorrow. And thank you Donna and Larry for the driveway and walk getting shoveled. BTW it is currently minus 6 Farenheit. And still a couple of inches of snow around the house.

Я американский

I am an American.

And in just a few hours we will be leaving. We had thought we might make an earlier flight but Delta only has three per week and they were full. So we leave Monday and pick up nine hours in route to Colorado. It will be a long day but we are ready to be home.

Our hearts may be heavier than we expected at this point but we've lost about 85 pounds of luggage. That's about 1/3 of what we brought.

Embassy Email

We don't see it on the Embassy's web site either but here is what they sent.

Dear Friends and Wardens,

The Consular Section of the U.S. Embassy will be closed to the public starting December 24, 2008, until January 9, 2009. During this period, assistance will be available in emergency situations only. For emergency assistance on December 29, 30, 31, 2008, and January 5, 6, 8, 9, 2009 please contact the American Citizens Services Unit directly at (+38 044) 490 4445. For the rest of the time, emergency assistance will be handled by the Embassy Duty Officer at (+38 044) 490-4000. Emergency services include: medical emergency, victims of violent crime, destitute Americans, detention or arrest, U.S. passport loss. Routine ACS services will not be provided from December 24 to January 9. American Citizens Services Unit will resume its regular working hours and services on January 12, 2008.

US Embassy Closure Dates

For those of you in Ukraine working on adoption we just want to make sure that you got the email from the US Embassy in Kyiv. They are closing from December 24 and not reopening for normal business until January 12. They are also planning to close at noon on December 19.

Thank You All

Thank you family and friends for your support during this time. The phone calls, emails and blog comments have been very valuable to us. We feel especially blessed with our new friends from among the Ukraine adoptive families.

Thank you Jim & Kari for the evening together it was just what we needed.

And still be willing to hang out after our instant backseat cramming still smelling direct from the the train ride shake and bake.

In case you haven't read it elsewhere the trains are HOT. In the hall outside our bunk room I found a thermometer that read 75. The room was hotter I'm thinking close to 80 with no way to open any window.

It's Not our plan

We haven't said much during the last week. We definitely fell in love with the boys, however they are not going to be our boys. When we were at the SDAPRC we were not told that there was a fourth family member. A three year old little girl. The short story is that after we were informed of her existance each official said it shouldn't be any problem to adopt the boys as she was already placed with a Ukrainian family. In the end the children will not be split up, we understand, but it isn't easy.

Now we get to practice what we have taught and said for years. It is not our plan but we trust that God does have a plan.

We will leave for Kyiv tomorrow. We could ask for a second referral but today we don't feel like thinking of anything. We could be leaving for home anytime from Wednesday through next Monday.

Learning how money works in Ukraine

At this point we feel it better not to comment on our situation with the boys. So since I haven't posted for a few days I thought I would talk about our experience with money in Ukraine.

First if you are bringing cash to exchange make sure that they are new uncirculated bills. Some banks or exchange companies have machines to verify that the bills are good but the safest method is new bills not folded.

Traveler's checks are not worth the hassle. If you have ever tried to pull out more than $10,000.00 in cash in the US then you are assumed to be a drug dealer and get to fill out extra forms and prove who you are and what you are using the money for. This is the same basic idea with traveler's checks in Ukraine.

Credit cards are accepted in some locations but are rather limited. Also make sure that you tell your bank the dates that you are traveling and where otherwise they will put a fraud block on your card. When I set up Skype I put an automatic refill from the credit card. However I told our bank we were traveling to Ukraine and Skype was billed from Sweden. Yes they stopped the payment. It's fixed now.

ATM cards. We were warned not to use these but they have been one of the easiest methods to use. Again make sure you have communicated to your bank that you want to use it outside the US. Also being slightly paranoid we limit the amount in the account and it is not our normal checking account card. We opened a new account with a bank that we have not used before. Then we left deposit slips with a neighbor and they add deposits as needed. There are still some catches to this. It has taken me an average of four ATM machines to get money. Sometimes they are not using a network that the card does. Sometimes the machines are out of money and sometimes they to not have enough for your request. Pulling out US $300-500 (2,000 - 3,500 Hryvna) is the equivelant of the average Ukrainian's monthly salary except in maybe Kyiv. So our plan is always to be pulling out what we need a few days in advance. Still I don't like carrying as much US currency as people told us too. ATM machines are very available in even small towns.

I assume this would also work with credit cards as most of the ATM's have Visa or Mastercard logos. Just haven't tried that yet.

The exchange rate was stable for most of the last two years that I have been watching it. Since we have been here it has really moved in our favor. We got 5.75 Hryvna (Greevna) to the dollar when we arrived and are now getting 7.50. Even including the fees it looks like we get the best exchange rate by using the ATM cards. ATM machines here are called bankomats.

This is clearly still a cash economy. And after hearing some stories I understand why. One person talked about a relative who bought a car taking out a loan. The bank wrote the note that said it had to be paid in hard currency. (Dollar, British Pound or Euro) As the exchange rate as gone up we have also noticed that the spread to buy dollars is now between 5-10%. This individual is now really hurting due to both the exchange rate and the extra cost.

Enough for now hopefully we can soon fill you in on more of the story. As my Aunt told us last night, whatever happens God is still in control. It's just easier to hear than put into practice.

Keep Praying

We have made some progress and are hopeful that we now have the right people involved to resolve the issues that have come up. We appreciate your encouragement and prayers.

The last four posts include pictures from the orphanage. Including something that I think is false advertising. We have only seen the sun two days since we've been in Ukraine, I'm not sure how one would know how to draw it ;-) Yes I miss my Colorado sun and blue skies.

The computer lab at the school is quite good they have one machine for about every six kids. It's not brand new but it is a good lab.

All of the buildings here including the orphanage are not too appealing from the outside. Many buildings are pretty decent inside. All parts of the orphanage are always clean.

Bureaucracy!!! Argh.

We know every country has it but we are frustrated right now. It seems that some paper work in dealing with the boy's family was not properly filled out. Now no one wants to take responsibility for it and simply fix it. So we have spent the last two days driving to the town where they were born (about 75 kilometres away) and talking to various administrators. Then they pulled a committee together we appeared before them and they have said that they will recommend approval of fixing the paperwork but they want to pass it on to a higher official in the state (Oblast) capital of Kherson to actually sign off on the paperwork. Hopefully that will happen today and we can get on with going to court for the adoption.

We have been able to visit Vitali at the hospital each day. He is doing well and is supposed to have his chest X-ray done today. Since he has not been coughing the last few days his Doctor expects that the X-ray will be good and that he is over his Pneumonia and will be able to go back to the orphanage.

Since we have been traveling we have not seen Dennis and Sergei for four days. I told Teresa it was a good thing we left them with picture albums so they will remember us. She alternated between slugging my arm and almost crying.

Hopefully good news and a timeline for this trip by the end of today.